1997 Mongrel News 

Legend Ensor's phenomenal run as the "Best Dressed " ended at the '97 Masters when Santa Crowles played in a slime green silk shirt, (rumored to be previously worn by Malcolm Johnson when he mounted Kingston Town) a pair of orange denim shorts and genuine red Roger Davis socks. "Looked a bit like a frog in a blender" was Long Drive's description of Santa's apparel.

The King Bonser was able to gain some solace from yet another defeat by Chad at the 1997 Mongrel Masters by taking out the Longest Drive Award. Once again, Chad and King went head to head in a match play type encounter, causing much grief from Tournament Officials for their tardiness and lack of sledging.

Having been caught mid coitus at the Sledge Ball in 1996, Harold was able to exact revenge on another Mongrel in 1997. Not comfortable with one peek, he went back for seconds!

Rowdy Murray has bought a nuclear explosive alarm clock that will absolutely, positively guarantee he will wake up from an alcoholic induced coma to attend this years Mongrel Masters. It was ten months before Chad would speak to him after yet another no show last year. Apparently Chad still only says one word when he sees him - c#@t!

It seems that the Mongrels are a fertile lot with the birth of a baby boy to Buddha and Louise and the announcements that both the Johno Johnson, Cerebral Borzi and King Bonser families are expecting in the new year.

Who was the mongrel that awoke from an alcohol induced coma in a hospital bed, after becoming somewhat inebriated at a work party ?

Cerebral Borzi has made the big move to Singapore after accepting the position of Managing Director of the Leo Burnetts Advertising Agency there. It is a fantastic achievement and we wish both he and Suzi good fortune. It now gives any Mongrel a stop over destination enroute to Europe. I am sure Cerebral would welcome the opportunity to have a punt and a drink with someone.

Spuddy Cruddy Murphy recently won first prize in the one minute television commercial section of the Metro film festival. This was achieved despite using Noni as a fisherman in the TVC. A notion many Mongrels would see as quite ironic, as Noni is undoubtedly the worst fisherman ever.

Click here for 1997 Results

Click here for the 1997 Mongrel Masters in Photographs

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